2013 Nov 16

Jennifer Lawrence Has a Great Answer for Any Strangers Who Ask to Be Her Best Friend

Jennifer Lawrence in Rome

One week and approximately a billion media questions about her haircut later, Jennifer Lawrence is still on the Catching Fire promotion circuit. The reigning best-actress-Oscar winner has circled the globe as part of her contractual obligations to the Hunger Games sequel, out tomorrow, and while visibly fatigued, Lawrence is still somehow eking out new endearing anecdotes, just at a slightly reduced pace.

The revelations made during this week’s press rounds:

The one person Lawrence would totally freak out over meeting is Bill Murray.

She has already freaked out over meeting Jeff Bridges and Jack Nicholson.

She will go to the mat for any secondary after-school activity that is not officially considered a sport.

When one of her fellow cast members, off track from a question, mentioned that synchronized swimming is not a sport, Lawrence jumped in defensively. “I was a cheerleader, and I don’t like it when people said that wasn’t a sport,” Lawrence said. “I can understand what you are insinuating with the synchronized-swimming thing, and let me tell you, they are athletes!”

If a complete stranger asks to be her best friend, she will not immediately say no.

One junket reporter dared to ask both the actress and Hutcherson point-blank whether they would be her best friends. While Hutcherson laughed off the question, Lawrence barely hesitated in responding, “What’s your favorite channel on TV?” Unfortunately, the Clevver News interviewer and potential B.F.F. failed the pop quiz by answering “the Travel Channel.”

After Lawrence laughed derisively, immediately dismissing the potential relationship, the journalist managed to regain footing by offering both actors candy bracelets that she had in an unmarked envelope. “We can be best friends now,” Lawrence conceded, taking the bribe. After gnawing through the entire bracelet during their brief interview, Lawrence promised her new B.F.F. that she would hold onto the saliva-covered string as a token of their fleeting best-friendship.

When asked what kind of product she would like to see her face on, as part of Hunger Games franchising, Jennifer Lawrence has a very practical answer.

After Hutcherson beat her to “toilet paper,” Lawrence said, “paper towels, because those are one of those things you’re are always so grateful to see, like wash rags . . . ’cause you are always out of paper towels. No one thinks to buy them.”

If you are a paparazzi, never ever bring a date on your J.Law-tracking mission.

After telling a horrific story about a Prius-driving paparazzo who brought along his girlfriend to hound Lawrence all day in her neighborhood, and how they flicked off the actress, she revealed that she has a revenge plan the next time she sees him: “I am going to bring him a cup of coffee with some antifreeze in it.”

Accuse Jennifer Lawrence of being whatever you want—just not a bad kisser.

“You’ve never complained about slobber in any other kissing scene!” Lawrence yelled at Josh at the insinuation that she slobbered on her co-star in any scene aside from the one she admitted accidentally slobbered on him. “I am not a wet kisser. That is gross. I would never be a swamp kisser, ever. Ever!’
Jennifer Lawrence once almost flipped out on Josh Hutcherson’s mother for not fulfilling her pizza delivery duties.
The most exciting moment, for Lawrence at least, occurred during an AOL conversation yesterday with her co-stars Josh Hutcherson, Jena Malone, and Sam Claflin. As she powered through repetitive fan inquiries, something caused the actress to recall a pizza-related incident that occurred in Lawrence’s downtime with Hutcherson on location in Hawaii. Readers, the two Catching Fire leads related this story with more vigor, enthusiasm, and eventually post-traumatic anger than they had summoned in all junket interviews combined. It was as if they were recounting a tale of finding buried treasure after years of searching, only to realize that the treasure was some desert mirage.

As is my duty as VF.com’s primary J.Law archivist, I’ve transcribed the anecdote in full below.

Jennifer, randomly: Remember when your mom didn’t order that pizza that one time, and I was so mad?

Josh: [You were so angry that] you had to walk away. . . . So we were at a house that we had over in Hawaii. We were all going out on this little adventure in kayaks from my house across the ocean to these other small islands. . .

Jennifer: It was 45 minutes there, and 45 minutes back.

Josh: My mom said for us to call her when we . . .

Jennifer: . . . got to the island . . .

Josh: . . . because she is going to order pizza that takes 45 minutes [to make and deliver].

Jennifer: So by the time we get back . . . the pizza is there.

Josh: So we paddle all the way back and literally the only thing that is keeping us going is . . .

Jennifer: . . . we’re all chanting, “Pizza, pizza!”

Josh: . . . and then we get [home], and the pizza has not even been ordered.

Jennifer: I’m like, [in angry giant voice] “Where is the pizza?!’’

Josh: She said, “Oh, want me to order it?”

Jennifer: I was like [mimes walking away], “Yoga breathing, yoga breathing.”